It’s hard to forget someone who gave us so much to remember – Unknown.
Adam was flown to Toronto by Air Canada in the last week of June 1986. Ruth and I went to the airport around 4 in the morning and immediately I took both of them for breakfast. We all had pancakes. I took Ruth back to her place and took Adam to where I was staying. It made me feel strange as I never ever had travelled with Adam without Lynda. Unfortunately, Lynda was stuck in Calgary until we got rid-of the house.
Adam was probably missing his mother but he was happy to be with me in Toronto.
I was helping a company which supplied household merchandise to small businesses. I found a software package to implement on a personal computer reasonably cheaply. It took a while to enter the inventory items into the system with the help of the owner’s wife, who was very keen to learn and work with me. However, what I learned from my mistake was that I had made a fixed amount contract for getting the system done. Unfortunately I had not taken into consideration how much time it would consume to enter all the basic data into the system before we even started producing any documents for packing and shipping. Consequently, I ended up using more time than I had anticipated.
I was trying to keep up with my assignments, and in the evenings I was making appointments to see houses and apartments for renting. I knew for sure that it didn’t matter what I selected, it was not going to come even close to what Lynda might like. But neither of us had a choice. Adam was a great help to walk through each property and point out what his mom might like, or not. Finally, we found a brand new three-bedroom house in Scarborough in a new development and decided to rent it. Adam was ready to complete his grade 8, and the elementary public school where he would go wasn’t too far from the house.
I paid the rent for the house for two months and we got the key. I realized that when I got back from Calgary with Lynda, our moving trucks might not be there yet. It was okay for Adam to stay with his cousins, but I made sure that I made a reservation in a local hotel to stay there until we got our stuff from Calgary.
I decided to take a cheap flight to Calgary. All the time on the plane I was thinking how I was going to hold Lynda in my arms and tell her how sorry I was for selling the house she loved. I wasn’t in a position to promise her to buy a better house in the near future, as I wasn’t sure how long it would take me to get established in the consulting business. I was generating some income, but it was a totally different ball game for me. Anybody who knew me in the business and saw what I was doing, would be amazed. But I wasn’t afraid or ashamed of working whatever way necessary to keep my family fed and sheltered.
We completed closing the house sale when I got there the next day. Lynda had already said goodbye to her sorority sisters. Some of the folks who used to work for me came to see me, which was nice. Finally, we said goodbye to the City of Calgary. We indeed had some nice days there, and made some friends. We made sure that the movers got everything on the truck before we started on the road to Toronto.
I was glad that I had an opportunity to spend time with Lynda while driving to Toronto, as the last few months we had been living in entirely different worlds. Lynda had lots of patience to listen to me about what I had gone through to get some contracts in Toronto. She was a good listener and from time to time she used to stop me and ask questions. I always thought whatever success I had in business, it had to do with Lynda’s ability to listen to me and give me meaningful feedback.
We discussed anything and everything on our way to Toronto. I also talked to her about exploring the possibilities of going to Saudi Arabia to work on a contract. She said you have been telling me about your desire to go to Saudi Arabia as long as I have known you. She said personally I am not excited with the idea. As a Jewish person I am not sure how I would feel living in Saudi Arabia.
I tried to tell her that I would only consider going there if I got a contract with the company where other foreigners were working. I understood that there was a kind of village where all the foreigners lived and mingled with each other. In other words you didn’t have to get involved with the locals.
She asked me how I was going to get a contract in Saudi Arabia. I explained to her that I had a friend in Chicago who decided to go back to Saudi Arabia. He got a nice job with Jeddah Electricity Company, and he had been talking to his boss for a while about me. It might take a long time to materialize, but I was hoping that something was going to come of it.
She said how well do you knew this friend of yours. I said He’s Indian by nationality, but he’s an Arab and his brother who lives in Jeddah got him the job. I have known my friend ever since we were kids in kindergarten. After a long time I met him in Chicago attending the same computer courses that I was taking. It was indeed a small world.
She said as far as going to Saudi is concerned, we would first see how things worked out for us in Toronto. I said I agreed with her wholeheartedly.
When we got to Toronto, Adam was totally thrilled to see his mother and wanted to know if everything went well in Calgary.
I had taken Adam to Brampton to see his nana more than once and we took mom out for a meal a couple of times. She knew that I was going to Calgary to bring Lynda to Toronto. As soon as we checked into the hotel, Lynda called her mom and told her that we were going to come and take her out for supper. It was nice to see mom. Lynda also had talked to her sister on the phone to let her know that she was back in Toronto.
We stayed in the hotel until the moving truck arrived. It took almost a week for Lynda to get things organized. Initially we ate out, until Lynda felt like cooking again. I had missed her cooking for such a long time. She cooked all the special things that I used to like, including curry.
At the same time I got another contract. A friend of mine from India had a civil engineering business in Toronto and he asked me if I would like to help him with his computer. It was a relatively small company. He had a few folks working for him. Their business was to get all kinds of contracts from the City of Toronto for various types of work to fix the roads in the city. He had a contract on a part-time basis with another friend to do his accounting, but I took care of everything else in the company.
Adam attended Scarborough Public School in Grade 8 and started playing hockey again. This was our 9th move (5 houses that we owned and 4 rental places). This was Adam’s 6th school.
Lynda went back to attending her Sorority meetings with the local chapter.
It seemed as if things were becoming normal but I wasn’t totally happy with the way they were going. Even though I was making enough money to support ourselves, I was missing the professional aspect of my current consulting contracts. To be totally honest, I didn’t even know what I was missing but there was indeed a “hole” in my professional aspirations.
Nevertheless, I was doing my assignments regularly. As a matter of fact I went to California for a week to meet with my advisor. I was told that I had completed my requirements for the Master of Business Administration (MBA) thoroughly. My next assignments for the Doctor of Philosophy in Computer Information Science with emphasis on Artificial Intelligence started right away.
Adam was enjoying school, playing hockey and keeping himself busy by delivering the newspapers (As usual, we were helping him with the delivery.)
The population of Scarborough was growing constantly and new houses and townhomes were being built everywhere to accommodate it.
Not too far from where we were living, there was a strip mall under construction. A huge building was designated for a Zellers store. Right at the front of the building there was sign advertising for all kinds of help in setting up the store.
On a nice weekend evening in late March of 1987 we were having supper in a local restaurant. Lynda said I would like to talk to both of you. I said about what? She said now you have enough consulting contracts to keep yourself busy. You don’t get home before 6 o’clock every day. Adam’s in grade 8 and he doesn’t come home for lunch, either. Therefore I am thinking of going back to work fulltime. I said “WOW”. I didn’t see that coming. She said Zellers is looking for all kinds of help to set up their store in the mall and I have some experience to offer.
Adam didn’t even wait for his mother to finish explaining. He said “I think it’s an excellent idea, Mom”.
Lynda said let me hear what your dad has to say. Adam turned around and asked me what do you think, Dad? I said I don’t have any problem with the idea. It sounds great. However, I was just thinking about the logistics regarding the timing of the shifts she may have to work. That could present a challenge or conflict with our schedules.
Lynda said let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. I am not sure if I will get the job. Why don’t I do it this way? I will go ahead and apply for the job on Monday. If I get the job, we will discuss its impact on our lifestyle. I said that makes sense to me.
I came home on Monday around 6:00 PM, got changed and came down for supper. There was a nice aroma of curry in the air. I said what is the occasion and what are we celebrating. Lynda said you will see.
As soon as we sat at the dining table and started eating, Lynda said I have good news to share with you two. Adam said you got the job. She said yes.
I said congratulations, my love.
She said they need me to work fulltime. There are only 6 weeks left before the store opens. There’s nothing done yet for the department they want me to set up.
I said I guess you got your favourite department, household appliances. She said that’s the only department I have ever worked in. I accepted a fulltime position, but I made a deal with the manager to start early and finish before Adam gets home.
I said I am proud of you. When are you planning to start working? She said tomorrow.
I said do you need to do any shopping for clothes? She said no, I have more than enough.
I said is there anything either Adam or I can do to make it easier for you to work and look after us. She said she had everything under control.
I said I can do the shopping if you give me a list of things we need for groceries. She said I think I will be alright as I am planning to work only on Saturdays, not Sundays, which will allow me one day during the week to take care of everything else. I looked at Adam and he said it will be alright, Dad.
The next couple of months I was busy with a new account. The company owned three Dollar Stores in the city and they wanted me to computerize their accounting system. Once again it was an entirely different kind of work than I was used to, but I was prepared to do almost anything to make a living.
Lynda was busy with her work, and at the same time she was taking care of everything that needed to be done at home. The good news was that Lynda was promoted to be the department manager for Home Appliances. She was happy with her promotion.
Adam was busy with his exams and his other activities, including making some money. I was always concerned that his other activities might impact his schooling, and from time to time I used to remind him. He always assured me that his focus was on his schoolwork, and he was getting good grades. However, I used to tease him about his marks. I remember once he told me that he got 97 in maths. I remarked jokingly what happened to those three numbers that you were missing? Lynda wasn’t very impressed with my comments. Subsequently I heard Adam saying that my dad never seems to be happy with my marks, which wasn’t true.
Adam was in grade 8 and this was his final year in middle school. I realized that literacy is a different ball game for middle school students than it is for kids in elementary school. While sixth, seventh and eighth graders are still learning new words, working on spelling, and improving their reading skills, they’re also starting to engage with words in new ways. I always said I don’t really care if he is a topper in his class as long as he has high marks in major subjects. I believed that if he continued that trend in high school, it would make it relatively easy for him to get into a reputable university either in Canada or in the States.
All parents of grade 8 students were invited to attend a dinner at the end of the term to watch their graduation. Lynda and I were delighted to attend the gala. We met some teachers as well as some parents before the start of the ceremonies. We shared the table with some more parents which was a very nice experience. However, we didn’t know what to expect.
Once everybody finished eating, the headmaster got up and explained the process. He said teachers would identify the students who topped in the subjects they taught and give prizes to those students. He said instead of just calling the name, the person who was giving the award would say a few words about the student to define his or her personality.
We thought it would be really nice to hear something about Adam if he topped any of his subjects. We sat there for more than an hour only to hear about the other kids who topped various subjects. We were happy for them. In the meantime, Adam was sitting next to his mother and tearing up every napkin at the table into a lot of small pieces, showing his frustration as his name wasn’t called. He had hoped that he would top at least in maths, which never happened. In the end, the headmaster congratulated those who topped various subjects. Then he said finally we need to announce the student who topped every subject: his name is Adam Ali.
Almost everybody in the room applauded Adam and he didn’t know what to do. He just stood up next to his mother. Lynda hugged him and started crying. The headmaster was waiting for people to calm down before he started talking about Adam. He said Adam was here for only one year, but he worked diligently every single day and set high standards for the rest of the students. He said, Adam, your name will be engraved and framed as the best student of 1987. It will be displayed with the other frames. Adam took the prize and thanked everybody for the honour.
We were so proud of our son.
Generally speaking, in the States and Canada at least, the highest ranked topper was traditionally granted the honour of giving the valedictory address at the commencement exercises. Thus the student with the highest grade point average became known as the valedictorian.
However, in those days the valedictory address was not necessarily made, or made by the top-ranked student.
Nevertheless, we as parents realized that becoming valedictorian requires hard work: getting organized, studying smart, and standing out in the classroom. We were very proud of our son.
I continued to do my assignments regularly.
